So to show you guys I'm still alive, here is my latest bean recipe, with bonus commentary Enjoy I recently changed some of the figures hence why you may get this twice

Wooo! Beans

9 cups Water
7 oz (half a link) sausage, sliced thin ( < 1/8" thick)
2 cups diced cabbage
1 cup Black beans
1 cup Navy beans
4 tsp salt
1 tsp Onion Powder
1 tsp Garlic Powder
1/2 tsp Black Pepper
1 Whole Jalapeno

Soak black beans and navy beans in water in separate containers overnight and in the refrigerator. As in, all the black beans soaking covered in water in their own container and all the navy beans in their own container. Be sure to soak them in extra water because they will swell in size and soak up water. If you soak every bean separately in their own container...send me a picture and we can all laugh at you.

Drain, rinse, and sort beans of split beans, skins, and foreign materials such as rocks, souls of the unborn, and unicorn eggs. Keep those unicorn eggs though, you can make a mint on eBay. Bring water to a boil in a large pot, at least 5 quarts in size, one you could probably fit your head in if you're the type playful enough to try. Add beans, sausage, garlic powder, onion powder, black pepper, and the jalapeno to the water. Do not add salt yet. NOT YET. DONT. WAIT TIL THE END. Because if you add the salt at the beginning the skins on the beans will toughen up and require longer cooking, making you late to the orgy. BTW dont forget the whips and chains this time that was a real downer. Return to a boil, then simmer for one hour. Stir occasionally, being careful not to bust the jalapeno. If you do, your beans are fucked. Like, srsly. Unless you want some spicy freaking beans. Add cabbage and continue simmering for 30 minutes. Stir in salt and serve.

Additional tips:

If you would like spicier beans, cut jalapeno in half and de-seed before adding to the water. Adding the whole jalapeno will result in very spicy beans. Unless thats how you roll.

You can also vary the salt to taste, thats another good reason to wait until the end to add the salt to the beans.

Side serving suggestions:

White Rice
Brown Rice
Broccoli (as if the beans alone arent going to blow a hole in your undies this will keep you up all night)

Taylor Lehr, aka TheYawningHorse

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I have had this ale glass for years, and while I have seen it before I never really have shared it with a lot of people but tonight I'm in a philosophical mood Looking through the glass as though one were drinking it you can see a "42" imprinted into the base.

The geeks and nerds can laugh and ponder at the placement of the meaning of life on an ale glass. Thsoe that don't know, [link] is a good start

Stay sober folks

Taylor Lehr, aka TheYawningHorse

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So apparently its become popular to post an online journal of one's dreams. Here is what mine would probably look like:

Night 1: Sorry, not posting this one, I'd get banned
Night 2: Or this one, maybe tomorrow night
Night 3: Nope, this ones worse than the first two
...
Night 73: Dammit dammit dammit stop dreaming about doing kinky stuff with horses! Where did everything go so wrong! "Gel"lo shots, are you insane?

The jist of the whole story is, equine repro has not been very kind to me

Taylor Lehr, aka TheYawningHorse

Make a stamp of your horse(s) and note me, I'll add it!

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...to get rid of the old one about flax seeds lol. BTW I learned to make some tasty crackers with them

So since there is really nothing to update y'all about, here is a picture of me wearing a watermelon rind for a hat with spoons and forks jabbed into it along with my keys:

Taylor Lehr, aka TheYawningHorse

Make a stamp of your horse(s) and note me, I'll add it!

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And now I'm not entirely sure what to do with them. So far my first two attempts at using them have not been wildly successful. I added them whole to cereal (didn't really work out) and as I'm typing this I figured out they don't mix very well ground up in scrambled eggs (you may collectively vomit). So anyone got any good ideas I can use for these before I disgust myself beyond belief?

Taylor Lehr, aka TheYawningHorse

Make a stamp of your horse(s) and note me, I'll add it!

:thumb52739468: :thumb53446378: :thumb55647386: :thumb61158177: :thumb74618258:

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